Dreaming of Onederland?

Urban Dictionary says “When dieters go from weighing 200 or 300 pounds down to 199 or less, they have reached Onederland.”

Onederland unified; I have also lost more than 100 pounds since October 2016.( *add disclaimer: I am guessing… I’ll get to that later…)

Consolidated with many contrasting emotions about being a heavyweight loser…. you would think that I’d be proud of the hard work that went into this transformation, but there’s more to it than that.

Onederland… It is still a miracle to me.

Most days I don’t believe it;

1. How is it possible I had over 100 pounds to lose?

2. I did it.

I never set out seeking The Promised Land.

For decades I searched my inner world for that broken something because something always felt messy inside. (Self hate is hard to live with no matter what size.)

Considering “I want lose 100 lbs” defied logic.

And self-shaming, body dismorphic, and all-consuming food thoughts were the only thing I could never talk about. My silent assumption has been, whether it’s 5 pounds or 100 pounds that I’d try to lose, the predominated, rioting, discord characterized by seething silence and subsequent attempts indisputably ended with a complete willpower breakdown! So why lament? Life goes on. I was secretly annoyed at myself for getting to those big #’s in the first place.

Now, I’m just frustrated with the lack of understanding around nutrition, exercise, and health. I’m not the same person now as I was then but yet, I’m not a better person, I didn’t do anything impressive to get thin. It took some really sweet, grueling, and revolutionary choices for peace of mind and happiness to surface.

Bright Line Eating was the secret sauce.

Say no to the scale, stop weighing in.

Well to be fair and to give you some insight where the Onederland love affair began, I have to admit something… I don’t weigh myself. The scale had been an enemy lurking in my bathroom for decades and was a source of many bad thoughts that created even worse behaviours. Wiping out the daily disturbance of said scale 15 years ago delivered immeasurable peace.

I regard scales with contempt and refusal to identify the all-pervading world of dieting most likely the result of an unhealthy onset from the traumatic days of Weight Watchers at the tender age of twelve. In beginning of my Bright Line Eating mental migration I made it my mission to create a sustainable way of life not a diet. (hang tight, the before and after photo is below…)

Bright Line Eating Bootcamp wasn’t a crash course, it was a constitutional shift, altering my awareness completely.

I didn’t want to just finish so I boomerang back to square one.

It was time to commit, surrender completely, to go all the way, all in all our life isn’t a crash course either.

The Happiness Project by Gretchin Rubin talks about the difference between resolutions and goals. You keep a resolution vs. obtaining and finishing a goal. Eager to keep going, I embrace baby steps and I finally made a bold resolution.

My goal was pretty simple… Just one meal at a time. Just one foot in front of the other.

In Bootcamp by Week 2 and I knew was on my way to happy, thin and free!! I finally found my golden ticket out!

I remember the very first pair of smaller jeans, it had been years since I wore size 12… that day felt like an absolute miracle. Size 18 -12 in 78 days.

And it wasn’t just in my imagination that clearing out the dust and noise of addiction, with clarity of mind- the brightness gives you symbols to raise you up. And Susan Peirce Thompson points to science to just further drive this home.

To make a long story short… create a mental picture of a riverbank and keeping a dam strong with all four lines intact, stick with the program so not let your food break your damn brain and revert back to old bad habits.

 

What to expect when you lose weight in large numbers.

It’s a tiny bit embarrassing to admit now… but I actually thought that all my troubles would melt away. After all, I coped with the compulsive eating which now seemed to be only the very near the tip of the iceberg. Week after week the pounds shed and my vulnerability grew. Clearly out of the blue, the feeling of being lonely or raging for the problems I have left untouched for forever…simply erupted- an emotional, psychological response to years and years of addiction came into light.

After years of therapy, I am thankful for my mental fortitude. And I figured being successful abstaining was fair compensation for the unexpected torment and surely saved me from relapsing into a food coma.

It’s simple math, right? Follow the program and you will be Happy Thin and Free!

Well… not exactly. The origin of addiction is all about broken, unhealthy, dysfunctional relationships we have with others, ourselves, and powers greater than ourselves.

As I was building a functional brain around food, other parts of me were breaking down. Loathing myself, flipping between the two modes of oh-what-the hell to oh-please-help-me, feeling defeated and confused. Being undisciplined in other areas of my life became more pronounced when it came to uncovering emotional tenderness while in recovery. I did not want to face too many more cans of worms but the misery and powerlessness inevitably showed up elsewhere.

There doesn’t seem to be a protocol as to actually unaddict oneself.

It was a complicate mess.

This was not a  very sexy reality.

It felt like I was facing the eye of the storm head on, or like being lost in an unknown country.

Formerly known by trying justify or explain, no longer requiring the need to validate my experience, everything changed.

(Nod if you are in agreement.)

To know myself and know my own relationship to food; my liaison with co dependence, surreptitious over spending, and the other gnarly devastating addictions crept in not far behind its almost forgotten refined food friends.

Thankfully, my recovery created more deeply loving awareness in my heart and the ROI was not only pure love and passion for my truth but very deeply empowering.

It took guts to figure out that I was the hero I have I’ve been waiting for!!

With compassionate humility, I get what you’ve been through.

I know how hard it is to use will power and diets and recover the pain we have all experienced.

Letting go –whether anyone else gets it or not–is the beginning of coming to our own rescue.

Bright Line Eating is a powerful metamorphosis.

I do believe it is was all the most treasured gift now. As difficult as unraveling my life became I do realize that until I made that cerebral shift I could never exceed in being happy, thin and free.

What I have found though this beautiful growth was there’s a difference between knowing “these are the changes in my body that  brought me this outcome” and “these changes had the following effects in my brain, which brought me this outcome.”

Cause and effect, causation and correlation – sublime, wild and baffling.

How to maintain weight after weight loss. There is even a diet plan to keep your weight off!

Of course, I learned quickly how the program works. Then what? Another diet plan to maintain weight?

So the question is: What (if anything) do you do?

1. I learned how to maximize connections to the Bright Line Eating community. After Bootcamp, Susan Peirce Thompson offered membership and some really compelling science to boot!! Based on her research the members that stay close to the mother ship had a 70% higher success rate with the program AND experienced the really sweet emotional and psychological growth that comes from a supportive like-minded community. (2 monthly group coaching calls, daily accountability calls, a very active supportive Facebook group, and even annual Family Reunion!)

2. Understanding you are so not alone. Food addiction is a very particular kind of crazy…so isolating, and so filled with shame. I am so grateful to be free today.  Bright Line Eating is my mission to create my sustainable way of life not a one-off diet plan so I can look beautiful on my wedding day.

3. It’s amazing to watch Susan Peirce Thompson take just the pure knowledge and transform it into action.

This is why.

The landscape of diabetes in North America tells the story of food addiction. Just this one statistic shows our discombobulated food and medical culture : last year 80,000 Americans had a limb amputated because of their Type 2 diabetes. How is that possible ? Who trades a limb for a chocolate bar? Only someone addicted and driven by a craving beyond their control.

And now my virtual mentor and secret friend Susan Peirce Thompson has released a new training video that deals brilliantly with this misunderstood addicted brain.

It’s awesome, go check it out.

Bright Line Eaters successfully do it and keep it off. Transform your life, not just for the short term, but forever.

I’m a big fan of solutions… like what to do when you are stuck and used to diving headfirst back into food obsession?

What’s most important to me is that there is formula, a sane solution and that this solution can work for others too!

I now know that I used to eat in that mind-numbing way, because I didn’t know how to stop. What I’m blown away by is how many people are happy to be told the truth. Just like me, people that  are exhausted and weary are relieved just to get the straight scientific scoop on what is happening in their brains and what they can do about it.

When I first started the program I felt like I would sabotage everything in my life by coming out and saying “no sugar, no flour, 3 meals/day and measured quantities of food.” It seemed extreme.

But it turns out the opposite is happening, months later food is easy and uncomplicated.

The way I see it, the majority is wrong most of the time… at least when it comes to diets. That’s why there aren’t many dieters that can survive over the long haul. However, there is one pretty amazing mega-trend happening right now that’s impossible to ignore (if you’re looking closely).

It’s something that probably slips by a lot of folks, but once you start looking… it’s everywhere.

1. Eliminate refined flour and sugar.

2. You can successfully lose weight without exercise.

3. Never underestimate the healing power of love. It is just as important for our survival as the food we eat, yet it’s free and available in unlimited supply. Love is the strongest medicine.

May I plant a seed for future consideration. Bright Line Eating has incorporated such unique insight because devises a strategy to shift into a habit mode that will take the choice and decisions making out of every food encounter.

Losing 100 pounds and home renovations are on a very similar parallel

Here’s what I found online on how to manage the stress of renovating your home and rebuilding:

  • Accept it will be stressful
  • Remember your why
  • Be kind to yourself.
  • Build in buffers
  • Give yourself a break
  • Get some support

 

“The strewn and tangled wreckage that litters our lives is the precious raw material from which great beginnings are forged.” -Craig D. Lounsbrough

Change is good. It’s also often hard. The status quo can be so much more comfortable. But to succeed in your life, you must run towards it.

Now it’s hard to imagine my life without Bright Line Eating.

I recently contemplated a question about living my passion:

“If you were the last person on earth would you still do what you are doing?”

Yes.

If you are ready to join me in these changes it means you have to change.

Just like the pain of renovation, in the end you will have a beautiful, comfortable home again.

Try the 14-Day Challenge, do the program for two weeks and give it your all. If you slip, don’t worry—get up and try again. Don’t get bogged down in choosing a diet and falling into the paradox of choice. Just pick a plan and stick to it.
Nevertheless, this video is phenomenal – and it’s an in-depth introduction to this awesome model for your weight loss success.

You can check it out here.

PS: When you complete this video, you’ll have an effective science to help stop letting the unnecessary hit or miss feeling you may have around your health and instead be able to be a leader on your journey with the best pro-active plan to lose weight and eat healthy.

My bright line body before and during:

.Bright Line Eating Before and After

Size 18                Size 10

June 2016          October 2017

(Today I wear a loose Size 8 and still losing steadily)

 

 *this post contains affiliate links

21 thoughts to “My body is in Onederland! Ever wonder what it’s like to lose 100 pounds?

  • travel and treatz

    Amazing transformation! Keep it up!!!! It’s great that you found a program that works… I think everyone has been there at some point!
    Great share!

    Reply
    • Kathleen Milligan

      Thank you so much!! It has been a enlightening journey for sure!

      Reply
  • Pashana

    Dearest Kathleen
    Your deep Journey of Healing and sharing is an inspirational Passage from defeat to victory.
    Your personal story of recognizing pure and simple acceptance of thoughts, actions and words that empower is delightful to read and learn from.
    To stand up for change and leave the old behind is the divining rods of New Life. It’s been a pleasure to see you blossom in wisdom and transformation even when the challenge seemed without benefit. You walk through the fire to know Your Divine Self so many may See a better Direction and come out of their own darkness into the Light.
    You could have settled with what appeared the easy way but the Light Inside was honored and what a gift you have freely given to provide tools of personal empowerment.
    No more swimming in the weeds. Diving into the crystal clear blue shining water of Natures teaching is beautiful and liberating.
    Thank You my lovely shiny friend.
    Pashana

    Reply
    • Kathleen Milligan

      Thank you for you r love and support! I deeply appreciate all the support and love. You are a treasure in my life, certainly a pillar in my community. Deep deep gratitude!

      Reply
  • Tarzan

    It has been an absolute privilege to witness your metamorphosis. You are a legend, Kathleen! I want the whole world to hear your story, so they will know what’s possible. Thank you for sharing you magic. I can only imagine what’s coming next for you!

    Reply
    • Kathleen Milligan

      The WHOLE world would be BRIGHTER with BLE!! I am certain we are heading home with hearts and heads aligned!! Thank you for your beautiful comment!

      Reply
  • Debbie

    what a beautiful article, I think everyone can relate to expectations of ‘all your troubles going away’ when you meet a goal, we’ve all been there, you explain it perfectly – and we can all relate! So enjoying your honestly and casual style of writing, thank you for sharing!

    Reply
    • Kathleen Milligan

      Thank you Debbie!! I love that you get it! Shifting our mind and body into health is so incredible, I am so happy you are here!

      Reply
  • Caleb

    Awesome article, most websites advertise about loosing weight but I see that you have included the overlooked aspect of how to keep the weight off after you have lost it. Great read!

    Reply
    • Kathleen Milligan

      Thank you Caleb. So true!! It is something I am deeply passionate about, permanent and lasting change… yay!

      Reply
  • Melinda

    Congratulations on the weight loss! There definitely is a psychological component to weight gain and loss. Carbohydrates are very addictive and once I get started on them, it is difficult to shut down the cravings. I follow the ketogenic diet, mostly for epilepsy, but also for the other health benefits that it offers. I find the more you focus in on eating healthy foods, the easier it gets! It sounds like Bright Line has been a wonderful support in keeping you on track to healthier eating habits!

    Reply
    • Kathleen Milligan

      Wow!! I am so impressed you are managing your health with diet! You are really taking good care of yourself. Thank you for your comment!

      Reply
  • LadyDi

    What an amazing article!! Congats on your weight loss…thanks for sharing!!

    Reply
  • Will

    Amazing article and transformation Kathleen! This is truly inspiring to myself and I’m sure many others. Keep striving to be the best and healthiest person you can be! Great job.

    Reply
  • Patsy

    Hi Kathleen I really enjoyed your article!

    To lose 100 pounds is a huge accomplishment. Not only are you an inspiration, you are beautiful! It’s great to read about the help and support which is much needed. Congratulations, your before and after picture is an eye opener showing this can be done. Well done!!

    Reply
  • Boby

    It has been a very long time since I read an article that can bring a tears in my eyes.
    Yours just did. It’s so inspiring, honest and everything that a post on this topic should be. I am sure it wasn’t the easiest thing to write, which makes it even more touching.
    A loud shout out to you for everything you have managed to achieve. Keep up the great work!

    Reply
    • Kathleen Milligan

      Thank you Boby! It has been a very long time since a comment on an article could bring me to tears!! Stepping into the community with my heart wide open is certainly uncharted water. I appreciate your very beautiful comment and compassion. So much love!

      Reply
  • Lindsay

    This is so great Kathleen! I love that you are choosing health….healthy mind and body over a number on a scale. I can feel the passion and conviction in your writing. I remember you guys eating this way at our retreat last year, it’s amazing that it’s become a permanent lifestyle for you. You sound like you are glowing! Yay for you!

    Reply
    • Kathleen Milligan

      Thank you Lindsay!! I am so happy to hear you “get it” … It only gets better. I am so grateful!

      Reply
  • Jen

    Bright … shiny and beautiful words. One-der-filled Kathleen!!!

    Reply
    • Kathleen Milligan

      You are a super star! Shine on, shine on.

      Reply

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